How To Know You're An Artist

Dear Upa,

                
             You're right. Art is an absolutely subjective entity, and it is different for you and me. To some, an artist may be someone who simply draws and paints for fun or as a profession. To me, at least, art is a very abstract concept. For me, an artist is a creator. It is someone who creates something out of nothing, and who feels like they have magic shooting out of their fingertips when they produce something they really care about. Drawing and painting is like a shade of colour in the wide spectrum that is art, there is so much more to it. So basically, even though not everybody is good in manoeuvring a paintbrush (and, like me, can't even paint their nails without it looking like a disaster) in their own way, anybody can be an artist. And so, for me at least, you definitely are one. Being like Nozaki Kun is epic because he created magic out of something he cared about. 

That's a lot like you.

In other news, time is passing so quickly! I literally just came back and so much has already happened. I genuinely feel like I was asleep for the past 16 years and now suddenly I’m shaken out of my slumber rather roughly and am now expected to DO stuff. I feel like I live in two cities right now and that is a complicated feeling to have. Since when did things get so complicated? We lived such a calm and peaceful life when we watched movies every week and ate lots of food and lived together. Why, life. After all, I’m just a simple farmer cosplaying a trashcan, why do these things happen to me.

If you haven’t guessed yet, I’m in one of my mad moods.

I will never let you crumble.

Bye for now,

Aditi.

How To Become An Artist

Dear Aditi,

                 First thing, sorry I am late. I was busy doing stuff. Also hanging out with you.  Secondly, we have decided that our update days will be Wednesday for me and Sunday for you.

So recently I have been practicing my art again, like those daily sketches and stuff I used to do. I painted a five-part dragon series, which you saw already. I also wasted a shit ton of money buying art material, and art supplies are so fucking expensive. This is why all artists are broke. That got me questioning myself though, am I an artist? Do I even have the right to call myself that? What makes a person an artist?

I thought the simplest answer would be that people who draw well can consider themselves artist. But, I know deep in my heart that is bullshit. What is a good drawing? Proportional figures? Perspective? Getting the skin colour perfectly right? I don’t do any of those properly.

Art is so subjective, that I don’t know whether to call myself an artist or an art student.  But even my horrible art teacher, she would give me 6 out of 10 on works that I was genuinely proud of, and really high on my works that were just eh. I am conflicted on what I am,  and maybe I am both. Or maybe I am none.

I see the world in a colour palette, knowing that the shirt you wore that day was a mixture of vermillion with a tiny bit of scarlet. I assume most people would called it red. I am also like Nozaki-kun in the way that I find a pretty thing and the first thing I think of is, that would be good reference.

It is going to take a long time before I crumble.

May your swords stay sharp,

Upa.

How I "Deal" With Excitement

Dear Upa,

                I’m probably not as interesting, but I accept your suggestion. Here are a few things about me that I can think of off the top of my head. 

• I have really long hair.
• I have found that I’m a very emotional person but am ridiculously bad at showing them.
• I try my best to do what I think is the right thing to do, no matter what other people think.
• I would do almost anything to make the people I love happy.
• I hate it when people tell me what to do.
• I think too much about everything. Twice.
• I get deeply, emotionally invested in very few things, but when I do, it’s not fun to watch. Percy Jackson and Phan, for example, have made me squirm with too many emotions on multiple occasions. 
• I  prefer dogs to human beings.
• I am very good at cracking jokes and laughing at them by myself for a very long time.
• I laugh at almost everything.
• I have a really funny laugh.
• I love laughing.
• I know almost the entire Merchant Of Venice by heart.
• My favourite colour is green. Pretty much any green. Especially leaf green. And mint green.
• I am really weird once you get to know me, but if you’ve taken the trouble to get to know me, you’re probably weird too.

Now, after that load of information that most people probably skipped, I’m going to EXPRESS MY EXCITEMENT. Seriously though, who would have thought I’d successfully spend a month and a half away from you guys and Buddy and my dad without losing it? And now summer vacations are here, which means I’m coming home VERY soon. This reminds me of something rather inspirational that I read once on the internet (surprise surprise): Don’t think you can’t do something just because you’re trash. It’s a trash can, not a trash can’t. Get it?

Now excuse me while I’m going to laugh at my unoriginal witty joke for a few hours. But you knew that already.

I’m also wondering if you’ll either run out of new ways of saying bye or crumble under the pressure of coming up with new ones. See you soon!

Bye for now,

Aditi.

How To Remember

Dear Aditi,

                I noticed the flow of our letters, and it is quite depressing because we are mostly talking about our fears in these letters. Which isn’t wrong, not in the least, but I thought we needed a little bit of change. These letters are a time capsule in a way, where one day we will go back to it and either cringe or be surprised at how less we have changed.

So, here are a couple of things about me that you probably know but I want to list them anyway for those 4 people who will read it, and I suggest you to do the same.

•  I have an obsession with sad/emotional music.
• If I don’t have any plans for the day, chances are that I won’t even bother changing from my pyjamas.
• I am extremely bad with languages, and yet I have a strong want to learn the Japanese language.
• I love oranges, the colour and the fruit.
• I have a weird heart-ish bean shaped birth mark on the right side of my torso.
• My life goal is to create my own animated movie.
• After London and Japan, the place I want to visit is Amsterdam. To meet a very good friend. 
• One time, I tried being vegetarian. That lasted for half a day.
• I am an extremely selfish human being.
• I honestly don’t know what my own personality is anymore, since I just pick up personality traits from my favourite character and make them my own.
• In the past month, I have made more new friends than I had made in the past three years.
• As time is ticking by, I think I am more excited to meet new faces.
• I am still socially awkward, but I just work with it now.

Next time, we shall decide the schematic to our house.  

Au revoir.

Upa.

How I Distract Myself

Dear Upa,

                First of all, sorry for not being able to post on time, but don't blame me, blame the fact that Mussoorie just has really bad connection and there was no Wi-Fi.

Anyway, while we're on the subject of things that make us happy, one of the things that has been making me happy recently is travelling. I just find the idea of visiting different places with different cultures and different lifestyles really, really cool. It bothers me that there is so much out there that I just haven't experienced.

I know, that with the internet and what not the world is literally at our fingertips, but I've found that scrolling through Google Images and actually visiting a place are still massively different. The past few weeks have been full of travel, and I have loved every minute.

If you're worried that you can't relate to me anymore, don't worry, because I don't think I can either. I don't blame you because this is quite unlike me. Maybe this is just a way to distract myself from the fact that I have moved to Delhi, or maybe this is just the next episode of my epic Existential Crisis saga where I discover the vastness of the planet we live in and the fact that there is so much out there that I will never experience. Or maybe this is character development for someone who hates change. Whatever may be the reason, I'm happy finding new reasons to be happy, and right now, I'm happy.

I guess this definitely helps for when we travel to London and Japan, though I don't think I need to be obsessed with travelling to have fun then, because you will be there. I'll see you soon. Sort of. Can't wait.

Bye for now,

Aditi.