how to be a cat

Dear Upa,

Recently, I’ve not been doing a very good job of not letting life overwhelm me. I wake up in a state of panic and I fall asleep in a state of panic (that is when I actually sleep and not sustain myself on naps), and the part in the middle just goes by in a blur of me trying to catch up with the things around me. People say I should make a list of things I need to get done to calm myself down, but honestly the idea of reiterating everything I have yet to do is terrifying. I just talk to Vandu or listen to a soothing video of Dan saying motivational stuff to calm down, and even if it’s temporary, it works like a charm. I realised today that the only thing I can say to comfort myself at this point is that it really just gets worse from here, so I shouldn't give up just yet.

But now I’m going to talk about things that have distracted me from feeling like actual mush. 

I got kittens. Two of them. They’re so soft and so fluffy and they’re inseparable, it’s adorable. The first day they were here all three of us were sizing each other up, because I don’t know if it’s obvious, but I have much more experience with dogs than I do with cats. Dogs are so easy, but you can never know what a cat is thinking. I assumed I should give them space, which seemed doable in theory but in reality proved to be impossible because of how FLUFFY they are, how am I not supposed to squish them? 

Vandu told me to treat them how I would expect someone to treat me, because it’s not all that different, and I realised that holy shit, she’s right. I thought I was more of a dog than a cat, but I realised that I’m definitely more of a cat. 

When I asked my sister which she thought she was more like, she said cat. When I pointed out that most people I know would actually be cats for some reason, she said that it’s because very few people are good enough at heart to be dogs. She’s right. 

I think Vandu would be a dog. 

Bye for now,

Aditi.