How to 2018

Dear Upa,

                 It’s a new year.

I look back on when 2017 began and honestly, things were so much more dramatic back then. 2018 was so chill, there were no metaphorical fireworks (there were real ones, I know because I happened to be outside my room when the clock struck 12 which is rare) when undoubtedly the most monumental year of our lives ended. Just like that. Over. A lot like death.

lol

2017 was like a roller coaster with really high highs and really low lows, and 2018 has so far been pretty chill in comparison, even if only 3 days are over. To be honest, it’s hard to start a new year and have real life punch you right in the face after the wonder that was the month of December. My plan for 2018 is to not freak out, to play to my strengths and to think of the most efficient way out of any problem, because that means I have to rely on logic and not emotions (which, for the record, is not one of my strengths). I remember trying to work hard at everything I do last semester, and while it’s a noble strategy, I’ve found that it’s not the easiest to follow. I’m just not made for studying hard, I tried it once and I swear it almost killed me. I’ll just go with the flow instead. Like a a dead leaf caught in downstream current.

Becoming 19 is another thing that happened! My birthday felt weird because it was unlike any of the other birthdays I’ve ever had, but I was grateful (and a little sick because of what I did in Mumbai but honestly I deserve that). There is no excitement left to becoming older anymore, now I’m just ageing, I’ve given in to fate. 

Buddy’s birthday passed too, and he’s 11 now, which means that I haven't spent more time with anyone else in my whole life. I’ve tried many times to write about how much I love him, but as cliched as it sounds, I don’t have the words. I love him, it’s as simple as that. He’s the happiest thing in my life. He’s home.

Which is weird, because I’m a little homesick. I hope we work harder at talking to each other because I miss you already, I want to spend weeks together like we used to. I don't want to stay away from my best friends, it’s lonely and hard to get used to because even if I think I’m used to it, it’s still as hard when I come back. ( ALSO I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SAID YOU'D DEDICATE SPRING DAY TO ME DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT MEANS TO ME I SWEAR THAT'S LIKE ONE OF THE TOP 3 BEST THINGS ANYONE CAN SAY TO ME (like,, even above "I'm reading On Patrol")  THAT SONG IS SO CLOSE TO MY HEART IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL I'M CRYING NOW I GOTTA LISTEN TO IT AND CRY MORE I THINK I CAN HAVE A 5 HOUR CONVERSATION ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS SONG and the only reason I'll stop is because I'll start crying)

It’s strange, how less of a life I have in Delhi when college isn’t on and how absolutely okay I am with it. If I was in Mumbai, I would have spent New Years Eve at a house party, probably tipsy (cause let’s be real I don’t get drunk), but instead I spent New Years Eve eating cookies with my dad, hearing Namjoonie’s wise words from So4More as the clock struck 12, ushering the beginning of yet another year.

“It’s been a year. It’s been a motherfucking year.”*

And we all know Namjoonie is never wrong. He has an IQ of 148.

I can feel it. 

2018 is going to be motherhecking great.

Bye for now,

Aditi.

*(I would’ve changed it to “motherhecking year” but I didn’t because censoring joonie is dumb).

Dear Aditi,

I'm writing this to you on your 19th birthday because I feel like it's a tradition now. Or at least it should be one. 

There are 6 minutes left for your birthday to end and honestly I haven't thought of what to say to you, because I forgot I was supposed to write this, so thank god for Vandu reminding you.

So, I guess I'll say this. I'm proud of you. There may be times in your life where you feel like you haven't achieved much, but I know you have. Of course, compared to how much you feel like you should achieve it's nothing, but you have this weird habit of undermining yourself. We need to work on that. 

But anyway, you did it. There is so much more you have to do. Once again, you were told by people how you've influenced their life positively, and as far as achievements go, I feel like that one is really lit. 

Also, once again, most of your gifts were BTS related and everyone reminded you how trash you are for Jin, so like, find your chill. (jk I love how consistent you are)

I'm so happy for you because you also have really amazing friends. We're so lucky. 

Let's fly in 2018 as well. Don't give up. Don't be afraid. 

It's going to be a good day. 

u read that in Jin’s voice didn't u I see u 

( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)